Thanks to better healthcare and information about nutrition and healthy diets, people are living longer and this means a growing population of seniors. With the increase of seniors comes an increase in Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, stroke, Parkinson’s disease and many other ailments that normally strike that age set. Not only do these illnesses prove debilitating to the person but the ripple effect extends to the family who now must take care of them. There are millions of people who are trying to juggle a career with children, their ailing loved one’s caregiving and other obligations.

You may seem alone in your caregiving duties but many studies show that at least 25% of all households in the country are caring for an ill loved one, usually a parent 55 years of age or older. These loved ones either need full-time caregiving, daily assistance for everyday tasks or somewhere in between. About 40% of caregivers in this country work outside the home so this means they are sacrificing their free, relaxation time to care for a loved one and are even losing quality time with their spouse and children. Work productivity goes down because of time off from the job to devote to caregiving, a reduction of hours or even having to quit altogether. This leads to loss of income and less money being invested in their retirements. You may be part of this group who is playing juggler too. While there is legal acts like the Family Medical Leave Act which helps keep your job secure (if unpaid) when you need to take time off to tend to the caregiving of a loved one.

If you are a juggler and feeling increasingly tired of all the obligations, there is a wealth of community resources available to help you in your quest to provide the best care possible for your loved one. From casual arrangements with neighbors, family and friends to structured care in nursing facilities, there are many options available to you.

Assessing your Loved One’s Caregiving Needs

Examine your daily schedule to see where you need help the most when caring for your loved one. Is it while you are at work? Perhaps you have obligations in the evenings with your kids and need help during that time. Know up front what you need before enlisting help. Also, you need to consider what type of care your loved one will need. Do they need 24-hour supervision due to dementia? Can they get around in the home and just need help with errands and transportation? Do you need other around the clock nursing care?

Once you have an idea of the type of care your loved one needs as well as the scheduling, consult with your loved one’s insurance company to see what type of coverage is available for nursing, caregiving and other  services. Long-term care insurance is usually not included in most regular health plans so you may have to see what you could afford to supplement the caregiving.

Finding those Resources

When your caregiving and that of friends and other family is not quite enough, you can turn to community resources to fill in the gaps. From in-home care to just daily visits from a home care companion, there are a number of options – and some even offer transportation so your work day is not interrupted.

In-home care is usually contracted through an agency, particularly if your loved one is dealing with an ailment that requires constant care or specialized training from a nurse or licensed medical attendant. There are agencies you can go through if you are hiring a companion for your loved one or you could even put an ad in the paper and interview candidates.

Adult day cares are an option if you must work and need a daily outlet for your loved one. These day cares offer everything from specialized care for dementia patients to activities such as games, crafts, exercise and more. Some programs serve lunch and some don’t while others may have pick-up to and from the home.

When you can no longer handle the caregiving duties on your own, there are nursing and assisted living facilities, depending on the level of care needed as well as group homes when 24-hour specialized care is needed. You must evaluate your situation from the health of your loved one to what you can and cannot handle care-wise. Finances and insurance are also issues that must be dealt with. If you can plan ahead with your loved one before they get sick or develop some type of impairment, it will be much better for you later when you have to deal with it.

Acting as a caregiver is never an easy task, but if the patient you are looking after has dementia, it becomes an even more difficult burden. Patients with dementia often cannot be left alone, and you have to worry not only about taking care of their health but also their safety. Plus, as the dementia worsens, the patient will become and more and more difficult to communicate with, and their mood swings can be distressing. If you find yourself in the position of caring for someone with dementia, learning to understand their condition and how to communicate with them as effectively as possible is critical for both of you. This will help the patient get what they need and will help lighten the load that you are carrying. Here are some tips to keep in mind when you are faced with a loved one with dementia.

First, know that the unspoken communication signals you use are as important as the words you choose. Sometimes, a patient with dementia may have a difficult time understanding your exact meaning, which can be alarming to them. However, if you use a calm tone of voice and maintain a friendly expression, even if your message is not getting across, the fact that you’re trying to be helpful and positive will. Losing your temper and raising your voice will escalate a bad situation and can be extremely unnerving for the patient – not to mention the fact that you will feel guilty afterwards. If you don’t think you can maintain your composure at any given moment, wait until later to deliver the message you need to deliver.

Of course, if you want to be understood, it helps if there is nothing else competing for the patient’s attention. Focus is a tremendous issue with dementia, and if you are trying to talk to the patient while you are also watching TV, playing music or anything else distracting, you are unlikely to be able to get your point across. Keep things calm and quiet to make talking easier.

When the patient tries to respond to you, keep an eye on their nonverbal communication. It’s very common for a person with dementia to mix up their words, or to struggle to come up with any words at all, but you may be able to help them get their own point across if you pay attention to their behavior. Do they seem alarmed? If you’ve asked them to make a decision about something, can they point at what they want? Do everything you can to help them make themselves understood.

Your response also matters. If you’ve asked a question, if the patient can’t answer you or if they give you an answer that doesn’t make sense in relation to the question that you have asked, be calm. Judge the situation and decide if you should ask another way or wait until later. Never argue with a person who has dementia. Physical affection is important here as well. A hug can calm a patient down, let them know they are safe, and in turn help them communicate better.

Last but not least, remember to keep it simple and clear. You may need to find a new way of talking when you’re dealing with a patient with dementia. It is in our nature to pepper our sentences with pronouns and slang terms, but this can confuse a person suffering from dementia. Call everyone and everything but its proper name so the patient is not left guessing and use visual aids and clues when possible. Communication will always be a challenge for caregivers and dementia patients, but the right approach can make a potentially extremely stressful prospect much easier to manage.